Thursday, July 16, 2020

Metaphors, Mixed not Stirred

She was a poetry book with the wrong dust jacket, shelved in the Reference section.
~Joyce Rachelle


A friend shared this with me. The name of the poet was cut off so I looked it up...I should have guessed it was Brian Bilston!


How to Avoid Mixing Your Metaphors

It’s not rocket surgery.
First, get all your ducks on the same page.
After all, you can’t make an omelette
without breaking stride.

Be sure to watch what you write
with a fine-tuned comb.
Check and re-check until the cows turn blue.
It’s easy as falling off a piece of cake.

Don’t worry about opening up
a whole hill of beans:
you can burn that bridge when you come to it,
if you follow where I’m coming from.

Concentrate! Keep your door closed
and your enemies closer.
Finally, don’t take the moral high horse:
if the metaphor fits, walk a mile in it.

Brian Bilston

*****************

Margaret is sharing a snake hunt poem that I wrote for her, inspired by photos of her family on a gator hunt.

Bookseedstudio has the Poetry Friday round-up. Thanks, Jan!

11 comments:

Jone said...

I love this. Put a smile on face this morning.

Bridget Magee said...

Hee-hee! This poem is "a whole hill of beans" of funny. Thanks for sharing. :)

jan godown annino said...

Hoot! Hoot! dear Tabatha!

You are the bee's Jammies.
The Bloom on the carrot.
I doff my raft, to you.
xo
Jan

Janice Scully said...

Love it! It's hilarious. What a clever poem!

laurasalas said...

Hahahahaha--love this. Thank you, Tabatha!

Margaret Simon said...

This week I participated in the Poetry Teachers Institute from The Poetry Foundation. It was wonderful. One presenter talked about writing nonsense poems by rewriting cliches. This would make a wonderful mentor text to go with that lesson. Saving it. Thanks!

Linda Mitchell said...

Ha! What a great way to shake one's sillies out. I need to keep this one handy for when I'm stuck in serious mode.

Irene Latham said...

Ha ha! I love metaphors so much and have been known to over use them, so this poem really speaks to me. :) :) :) Thank you, Tab. xo

Ramona said...

Love catching these mixed-up metaphors. And smiling! Because we can never have too many smiles to see us through the crazy times we're facing.

Matt Forrest Esenwine said...

Ha, I love this! And yes, I do follow where you're coming from...thanks for sharing!

Michelle Kogan said...

Well those poor cows, I'm hoping the poet wrote a short poem, so they have enough breath to get along home… Thanks for the delightful poem Tabatha! Going off to check out the "Snake hunt " next…