~Shannon L. Alder
Dr. Aziz seems like a nice guy. (Note: some cussing)
From A Helpful Guide to Stop Comparing Yourself to Others by Joshua Becker
1. Comparisons are always unfair. We typically compare the worst we know of ourselves to the best we presume about others.
2. Comparisons, by definition, require metrics. But only a fool believes every good thing can be counted (or measured).
3. Comparisons rob us of precious time. We each get 86,400 seconds each day. And using even one to compare yourself or your accomplishments to another is one second too many.
4. You are too unique to compare fairly. Your gifts and talents and successes and contributions and value are entirely unique to you and your purpose in this world. They can never be properly compared to anyone else.
3 comments:
There are no easy answers here. I don't think comparison in itself is the problem but rather what we do with the comparison, how we use it, when we use it, and the standard we use. Our response and use of comparison is where the danger lies. If we respond in a healthy way, comparison can support growth, improvement, or wholesome acceptance. For example, the use of mentor text in writing instruction is a form of comparison and can be used to grow skills. Pondering ... like I said, no easy answers. I know that knowing who I am and my worth is rooted in my faith.
Is mentorship comparison? I hope not, in that I really don't want to compare myself to Robert Frost if I use one of his poems as a springboard. And if I am mentored by someone, or am their apprentice, I hope I consider myself their student and don't feel pressure to perform as a peer.
Anne Lamott talks a lot about jealousy stemming from comparing herself to other writers. She struggles with that quite a bit.
The inspiration for thinking about this, though, really came from things I have heard about young people feeling bad about their own lives based on what they see on Instagram.
Thanks, Alice! You're right -- how we respond and use comparison is the key!
Self-criticism can come from other states of mind, too, not just comparing yourself to someone you think is superior to you. For example, berating myself for mistakes I make is my own stumbling block to self-confidence.
The video is good for healing no matter what causes your pain.
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